Chapter Two: Learning New Skills

Skill Number One: The Lottery Machine!

This is a mean, very menacing-looking blue machine which is situated right behind me. In short, it dishes out stuff like...

Lotto
Euro Millions
Thunderball
Daily Play

and checks winnings off of scratch cards and lotto tickets alike.

Before each new transaction, one must check that the last has been totally cleared. Honestly it doesn't really matter, but it is best to do these things properly. If the last transaction has not cleared, press "Total" "Send" "Sales Display". The rest is pretty straightforward. But not once one starts out, you understand.

For all transactions, if the customer gives one a slip with their numbers on it, then just feed it into the machine. That's the simple part. If the customer does not have a slip with their numbers on it then, in all cases, press "lucky dip". This enables the machine to choose numbers all by its smart little self.

Lotto: Press "Lotto".
Thunderball: Press "Thunderball".
EuroMillions: Press "EuroMillions".

In other words, use some common sense.

One customer confused me very much however by handing me two pieces of laminated paper. Both pieces were branded with the official "Lotto" logo and had sets of numbers on them. They also had a barcode each.

Apparently all one has to do in this case is press the "Pay card" button and then scan the barcodes into the machine.

The problems start when a customer wins something. One must remember to press the "Pay" button first. I think. Scratchcards require "Scratchcard pay". Hhmmm. Then scan the long barcode into the machine.

At the end of every transaction, press "Total" "Send" "Total" "Send". That should do it.

The problems only get worse when trying to key these into the till. A simple sale requires pressing either "Lottery sales" or "Stamps and Lottery" and then "Lottery sales" depending on whether or not the button on the touch-screen decides to hide. A EuroMillion requires "Stamps and Lottery" followed by "Euro Millions" simple enough.

A Lottery pay-out requires first "Item refund". The "item" is returned without original receipt and is in mint condition. Scan the ticket barcode. I think. Hhmmm.

Trust me, it did not seem that simple at the beginning.

Skill Number Two: The Cigarettes...

One must first remember to ID people. The recent introduction of the "Challenge 21" policy means that anyone looking under 21 years of age must be ID'd.

Secondly, I usually give the customer a somewhat baffled look if they have asked for something I have not yet been asked for. I try to repeat what they have said...

"20 Silk Cut blue?"
"B&H meaning Benson & Hedges?"
"By 'light' do you mean smooth or filtered?"

and then there is the embarassment of...

"Sorry we only have gold or black"
"No no you do have silver"
"OK..."
customer follows alongside counter
"It's there... down... down... left... beside the Marlborough"

One customer was chatty enough to remark, "You're clearly not a smoker then, are you? I can always tell in shops..."